Why is it that at eighteen I feel heartbroken and still I've never been in love. Not in the sense of romance anyway. I can barely breath and every time I think about it i feel this shot of pain where my heart is. Like it's actually breaking.
Bad things have happen to me in the past. Things that I am not proud of and that in some ways, maybe more then I want, still haunts me everyday. They come creeping up on me like a ghost and just one comment from someone can make the ghost grab a hold of me. It then flys in to me and becomes a monster in my stomach.
It seems as if there is one person in particular that makes the monster appear. One person that consciously or unconsciously says the things that provokes the ghost.The funny thing is that in many ways she is the one person that knows the most about my past. And to have that knowledge and still say the things she knows brings the monster makes her either a very cold insensitive person probably with some form of Asbergers or a Cold hearted Bitch that likes hurting and devaluing people she calls friends.
But what do I know? I'm just a hurt girl that seems to have a back-stabbing "best friend".
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